Nicole - Just an Illusion

"I think we are all insecure, and there is nothing wrong in accepting that. But the problem arises when we try to counter this insecurity by cultivating this illusion of control, and we start taking ourselves and everything we know too seriously."

Mirror A

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You, the Writer

What was your writing identity prior to the course?

Myself as a writer I didn’t believe myself to be that creative with my works. I was considered the “creative” student in my other classes for my writing pieces I did occasionally but I don’t see it. I see myself as a closed off writer and my writing minimal at best. I wasn’t at all creative. I had writers block on a daily basis and when I didn’t, I only wrote a couple of lines and even then they were lacking. I acknowledge my writing possibilities but I was never able to share my works so I never wrote anything major.

What is your writing identity now?

A budding writer. I am still that silent girl in class that always has her headphones on but now people have seen my thoughts on pages, my life, my experiences and no one judges me for that. I may be silent but my mind speaks volumes far greater than my silent voice ever could. I am a descriptive writer and writes from personal experience; I am not one for writing poems since my mind can never say so little. Anything below 500 words is a crisis for me since it feels I have to write so much more and so for that, poems have been my nemesis. My mind is the most active thing so when I’m spacing out its actually me trying to think of my next blog post or writing piece. I’ve never been happy with my writing pieces but I can respect the effort I’ve put into them.

Reflect on your development as a writer.

Genre: Fiction/Fantasy. I mostly write from personal experience, fiction, and descriptive literature. I tend to go overboard with my descriptive pieces and my personal ones but that just gives you more insight into my heart and mind and that’s what writing is all about. In the past, I wouldn’t let anyone see into my head at all. I liked the peace of my thoughts and keeping them private but then I joined Creative Writing. Silence didn’t last long.

Ideas: All of my ideas come from personal experience, objects, or other people’s writing. My fictional pieces revolve around author’s stories and so I can build my ideas from a simple word. Objects like vintage items give me ideas of backstories or experiences it has gone through and also how it looks.

Details: I am a visual person so details in my writing are extremely important to me. If I can get the reader to visualize the same thing that I do, then my job is complete. It has always been like that. I am OCD so I see details more prominently than the average person and the need to describe what I see is very strong.

Structure: I am still not happy with how I structure my writing pieces and slowly but surely I’m getting there. It’s always been like that. Structure is almost never my first thought so it gets done after everything else is finished. It is usually in paragraphs and slightly spaced out.

Voice and style: I do believe that my mind speaks volumes. My words are all the voice I need and you can find them all on paper because you will never hear them from me. I didn’t like people and in turn never spoke about anything but when you decide to give me a place to put my thoughts, you will be given a story of my past, my emotions, my everything. My style hasn’t really changed at all from a few years ago till now. I’ve always been like that and I don’t think I’ll ever change.

GUMPS: I do have my moments where I misspell something or put a comma or period where a semicolon could’ve been used but it is rare. I’m in English so it is uncommon to see too many mistakes in terms of punctuation, capitalization, and spelling errors. Even in the past my GUMPS were in order for the most part. Seems like some things never change.

How would you explain your voice?

Very small. I don’t really talk in class so my voice is super quiet. No one knows about me because of my lack of a voice and I would keep to myself about everything. I resorted to writing to get my voice and that’s when I joined creative writing. As mentioned before, my mind speaks volumes more than my voice ever could. Give me a computer and you get all of my thoughts. I would never say it in person but you will see it on paper. It is powerful at times and can be overwhelming but I like to think that once it’s down on paper or in the code, I never have to replay it and it will always exist. Memory and time could never wipe it away completely.

What is stylistic of you?

I guess my outrageous use of detail and the widespread use of commas I use in my writing pieces. I don’t like many periods and my writing is fast so it can’t have many silences. My mind isn’t silent, it is loud. Very loud. My writing is my mind and my mind is my writing. It is loud; it is fast and that’s how it has always been. I like to use lots of detail and my writing is never anything but chaotic. Detail helps me to quiet my mind since it is always screaming about details. I don’t think I have truly found my style yet but I will keep trying.

As a mentor writer, what advice would you give to future creative writers?

Don’t delete your work. Please. I did and I regretted it immediately. No writing is ever bad and even if it is only a few words or sentences, you will complete it, it just might need some time. You will get out of your writers block you just need the right thing to push you out of it. Also, if you get inspired by something, write it down immediately. Many opportunities are lost for writing all because they didn’t write it down. Organize your thoughts and let your imagination run wild.

Future goals and plans regarding writing?

I think i’ll keep it as a hobby. I’ll be updating my blog weekly probably and if not, i’ll post updates. Some of my best works are on there and I don’t want to lose those so i’ll keep writing my Legacies and hopefully I will inspire someone who passes by my blog.

 

 

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